Ryan Kessler, a 28-year-old IT specialist in New York, admits he has never mustered the courage to approach a woman in public, whether at a coffee shop, bookstore, or airport, despite his desire for a partner.

"I fear being perceived as rude, or worse, a harasser," Kessler stated. He considers himself decent but finds security in dating apps like Bumble, where users can initiate connections, thus avoiding the risk of real-life rejection.

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This phenomenon is widespread, with a study by the University of Groningen in the Netherlands revealing that nearly one-half of single Western men experience a "fear of approaching women." The survey found that 44% of men admit they hesitate to initiate contact, fearing they will be labeled "creepy." A DatePsychology survey further highlights this trend, showing a striking statistic: 45% of men aged 18-25 have never approached women in person for dating.

This reluctance stems from a post-#MeToo shift in perception, causing men to increasingly worry that a simple approach could be misconstrued as sexual harassment. The ubiquity of smartphones also fuels fears of being filmed and ridiculed on social media following a rejection. Furthermore, this generation largely lacks direct communication skills, having grown accustomed to the perceived safety of social media. The Covid-19 pandemic exacerbated social anxiety, making in-person interactions feel unfamiliar.

Paradoxically, while men are hesitant, women often desire proactive approaches. A significant 77% of single women aged 18-30 expressed a desire for men to approach them more frequently. Liv, 20, appreciates men who initiate conversations politely. "In this era, a man who dares to approach respectfully performs a brave and admirable act," she said.

Connell Barrett, a US dating expert, advises men to be proactive yet subtle. "Grace and empathy are key. Do not objectify women for your emotional gratification; approach them with respect," he stated.

However, not everyone is ready to adapt. Grant Greenly, 24, has abandoned flirting after repeated failures both online and offline. He believes the distinction between a friendly approach and harassment has become too blurred. "Even a simple 'hello' to an attractive woman can be met with discomfort. I now think women should initiate contact; that's genuine gender equality," Greenly asserted.

Levi McCachen, 37, a comedian, shares this sentiment. He prefers to engage only with women who initiate contact. "I was taught that if you enter a room with 100 women, 99 will be uninterested. But one will always like me, and she will make it known," he shared.

By Ngoc Ngan (Based on NY Post)