With 22 years of experience handling divorce cases, French lawyer Amelie Gairaud notes that clients rarely tell the truth about an affair, even to their lawyers. According to her, when the truth is revealed, reconciliation between couples is almost impossible.

"From a practical perspective, I advise clients to remain silent. In many cases, concealment is the key to saving a family, because I have never seen revealing the truth improve a relationship," said Amelie Gairaud.

This view is shared by philosopher Pierre Zaoui. He believes that couples are not obligated to tell each other everything. Instead of blindly pursuing a model of "confession for transparency," people sometimes need to use lies to avoid causing harm.

Zaoui observes that confession is sometimes a way for the unfaithful person to relieve their psychological burden, but it shifts the pain onto their spouse.

Fabrice, in his 60s, admits he is exhausted living a double life to hide his affair. However, he states he does not feel tormented by the extramarital relationships themselves, but fears the pain they could cause his wife and partners if everything came to light.

Photo: Aleteia.

However, experts point out that concealment often comes with rationalizations. Director Emmanuel Mouret, who studies psychological dynamics, notes: "Everyone tells themselves a story and assigns it moral value to feel not too bad."

Anne, a woman who was once the other woman, said she used to believe her lover when he cited responsibility to his children as the reason for staying with his wife. After seeing a psychologist, she realized the man maintained his marriage only for convenience and social facade, disregarding the fact that his children would live in a fabricated family.

Philosopher Jerome Poree warns that a relationship maintained by habitual deceit will reach a dead end. Concealing betrayal only adds another layer of pretense to an already fractured marriage.

In cases where one decides to confess, the person involved needs to clearly define their purpose. French sexologist Patrick Papazian emphasizes the need to distinguish between "unburdening oneself" and a confession that helps the spouse understand the truth.

"The unfaithful person needs to show subtlety, omitting unnecessary details. Rationalizations like 'it was just physical' do not offer comfort," Papazian said.

Bao Nhien (Source: Le Monde)