During a late September broadcast of the reality television program My Little One, Xiao Yingjie, mother of Olympic diving champion Zhang Jiaqi, read a letter she had written to her daughter before the Tokyo Olympics 2021. In the letter, she wrote: "Even though you didn't perform well, I still choose to trust and forgive you."

At the time, Jiaqi was 17 years old and intensely focused on training. Ms. Xiao's use of the word "forgive" to assess her daughter's efforts drew strong criticism from viewers. Related posts garnered tens of millions of views on the Weibo platform. Most opinions suggested that the athletic environment is already demanding enough, and having one's efforts denied by family members creates an overwhelming sense of pressure for children.

The program also highlighted a long-standing generational conflict between the mother and daughter. While Jiaqi was competing, Ms. Xiao managed all of her daughter's income, including three bank cards and a bonus of 810,000 Chinese yuan (115,000 USD).

Ms. Xiao rarely visited her daughter after Jiaqi left home at the age of 6 to train, despite having no work commitments. On television, she frequently admonished and criticized her daughter for everything from her eating habits and voice to letting her cat climb on the table or being lazy. The WeChat messages she sent her daughter were primarily instructional. In response, Jiaqi chose silence.

Jiaqi stated that she always felt a lack of maternal love and once resented her mother because her family was not what she had envisioned.

"The team raised me, not my mother," she said.

Xiao Yingjie and her daughter Zhang Jiaqi. Photo: Sixth Tone

On the social media platform Xiaohongshu, many users praised Jiaqi for daring to confront her family's control. Some accounts linked Ms. Xiao to narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), a term commonly used online to describe controlling individuals, though it is not a medical diagnosis.

Psychologist Li Songwei, a guest on the program, noted that this conflict reflects unresolved emotional issues prevalent in many traditional families. He mentioned that Ms. Xiao has since recognized her mistakes, apologized to her daughter, and enrolled in a class on communicating with children. "This is typical of a mother whose judgment is clouded by anxiety," Mr. Li stated.

Zhang Jiaqi, 22, born in Beijing, won a gold medal in women's synchronized diving at the Tokyo Olympics 2021. After retiring in 2025, she pursued a degree in sports coaching at Beijing Sport University and became an online content creator.

According to Sixth Tone