One mid-june afternoon, Ms. Hoa, 70 years old, set her basket of cakes down on the sidewalk of a street along the To Lich river, gazing at a house across the road. "That used to be my home", she said.

Her husband passed away 50 years ago, leaving Ms. Hoa to raise her two children alone. When her children started families, she handed over all her assets. She divided her 70 square meter plot of land for her two sons to build homes, believing her old age would pass peacefully.

However, the Covid-19 pandemic hit, causing her children's businesses to fail. They had to sell their homes to pay off debts. Suddenly, the entire family lost everything, and Ms. Hoa, her children, and grandchildren were scattered.

Not wanting to burden her children, who were struggling with debt, Ms. Hoa rented a room to live alone, selling street food daily. In the mornings, she set up her stall directly opposite her old house, and in the afternoons, she moved her basket to a school gate. On busy days, she earned 200,000 dong. Recently, her rent increased, so she moved out and asked to stay with relatives. "I am saving for the future so my children don't have to worry", she shared.

A senior citizen sleeps beside her street stall on a Hanoi street, 3/2026. Photo: Phan Duong

A senior citizen sleeps beside her street stall on a Hanoi street, 3/2026. Photo: Phan Duong

In Nghe An, Mr. Toan, 90 years old, faced uncertainty about which child's home he would live in next month. After suffering a stroke in 2019, he had difficulty walking and could not manage personal activities independently. His lifelong assets consisted of a one-story house, with no pension or savings. He relied on a 500,000 dong senior allowance and income from renting out a few sao of rice fields (traditional Vietnamese land measure).

In early 6, all nine of his children created a schedule, assigning each child to care for their father for one month, rotating until his passing.

Mr. Toan's eldest son stated that he had cared for his father since 2019 under an agreement that he could remain in the one-story house to maintain ancestral worship, but not sell it. However, his siblings disputed the land use rights. The schedule was created to divide the responsibility of caring for their father until his death. The land will be divided by the authorities according to inheritance law.

For a 90-year-old man with mobility issues, moving to a new residence is not simply a matter of packing belongings. Mr. Bach and likely his siblings are aware of this. "This is a last resort solution", Mr. Bach admitted.

The gap behind filial piety

Ms. Hoa and Mr. Toan are both facing a situation where old age is not secured simply by having children. Historically, Vietnamese families often had multiple generations living under one roof. Parents held land and assets, serving as the family's center. Adult children remained connected to their homeland and farmland. In this context, the model of 'children rely on parents when young, parents rely on children when old' operated relatively sustainably as a natural social security solution.

However, things are changing. Vietnam is among the nations with the fastest population aging rate globally. The country has nearly 15 million senior citizens. This number is projected to rise to 18 million by 2030 and reach 21,5 million just five years later, according to the General Statistics Office. An average of 700,000 people join the senior age group annually.

Professor Doctor Giang Thanh Long from National Economics University stated that the social safety net is not yet deep and broad enough to accommodate this wave. "The horizontal coverage rate (number of beneficiaries) is increasing, but the vertical coverage rate (benefit level) remains low and does not ensure a sufficient standard of living", Professor Long explained.

The traditional "three generations living under one roof" model, which was the foundation of the 'parents rely on children' concept, is gradually changing. A 2021 report by the United Nations Population Fund (UNFPA) noted that approximately 4,5 million senior citizens in Vietnam live alone or in households with missing generations.

The 2022 Vietnam Aging Survey (VNAS) revealed that nearly 60% of senior citizens' expenses come from labor and support from their children, while pensions and social assistance account for 15%.

Over 10 million senior citizens in Vietnam remain outside the social safety net, relying on meager savings or family assistance; more than 60% of them still need to work, primarily in agriculture or precarious informal jobs.

Senior citizens exercise in Dong Ngac ward, Hanoi, 6/2026. Photo: Phan Duong

Senior citizens exercise in Dong Ngac ward, Hanoi, 6/2026. Photo: Phan Duong

The decline of the traditional family model in Vietnam mirrors trends seen in many Asian countries. Doctor Kumarashvari Subramaniam from British University Vietnam (BUV) noted that in aging nations like Japan, South Korea, and China, the expectation for children to bear their parents' financial burden has gradually decreased. "Urban migration, low birth rates, and pressure from high housing prices and living costs make complete reliance on children less feasible", the expert analyzed.

Preparing for independent old age

In Chuong My, Hanoi, Ms. Tuyet Hong, 86 years old, chose a secure path for her old age very early on. She uses her 3,5 million dong pension, along with savings and money from selling her house, to pay 7 million dong each month for her nursing home expenses.

"From a young age, I decided I would take care of myself in old age", said Ms. Hong, a former official who once worked in Hoan Kiem. A few years ago, she lost some money due to a bad investment and moved to a suburban facility, but still had enough to maintain her independent life.

Doctor Subramaniam believes that financially independent senior citizens do not diminish family values; rather, they become the "glue" that strengthens relationships. From a psychological perspective, economic autonomy brings mental well-being. Studies indicate that senior citizens who are financially independent tend to be more optimistic, confident, and better able to control their lives.

From an international perspective, Mr. Takanori Hisaoka, Chief Executive Officer of Kiramekikai Social Welfare Group (Japan), warned that urbanization, nuclear families (only two generations), and the wave of labor migration are severely reducing children's ability to support their elderly parents – a phenomenon Japan has experienced and Vietnam is beginning to face.

Experts suggest that caring for senior citizens is a valuable Vietnamese tradition that should be maintained, especially as aging approaches and Vietnam still lacks a comprehensive community care model. To prevent tragedies, family structures need reinforcement through multi-functional community care models, combining daycare services or home visits. In this model, the family remains central to care, but the pressure is shared by a healthcare network, helping children fulfill their filial duties while maintaining their livelihoods and careers.

Ms. Hong, 86 years old, (left) walks with a friend in a nursing home in Chuong My, Hanoi, 6/2026. Photo: Dien Hong

Ms. Hong, 86 years old, (left) walks with a friend in a nursing home in Chuong My, Hanoi, 6/2026. Photo: Dien Hong

Psychologist Doctor La Linh Nga, Director of the Center for Research and Application of Psychological-Educational Sciences, believes the issue is not about keeping or abandoning the 'parents rely on children' model, but about how the two generations connect. Parents should not give 100% of their assets to their children but should proactively retain reserve finances for themselves. More importantly, when children are raised with love and respect instead of imposed responsibility, gratitude will naturally blossom, allowing the two generations to rely on each other voluntarily and happily.

Facing hardships in her twilight years, Ms. Hoa has never uttered a word of complaint. She views both joy and sorrow as "her destiny". Many compassionate customers often intentionally refuse change, but she insists on returning it. "Receiving a single dong from someone else also means incurring a debt", she said, smoothing out the 15,000 dong a customer had just paid for a cake.

* Some character names have been changed.

Phan Duong