Dr. Tra Anh Duy, from the Men's Health Center, reported that the patient came in for difficulty maintaining erections, decreased libido, and fatigue lasting 4-5 months. He worried about decreased testosterone or a male health condition. His patient history revealed he often worked late on his phone and laptop, then continued scrolling social media until 1-2 AM. His wife also had a habit of watching videos on her phone until she fell asleep, leading to less conversation between the couple, and intimate gestures before bed almost disappearing.
Examination results showed normal hormone levels, blood sugar, and blood lipids; penile vascular ultrasound revealed no abnormalities. According to the doctor, the issue was not organic sexual dysfunction but stemmed from prolonged sleep deprivation, stress, and a decrease in emotional connection between the couple.
"Phones were created to connect people, but in the bedroom, they often become 'the third person'", Dr. Duy stated. When each person focuses on a screen, the brain struggles to switch to a relaxed state. Blue light inhibits melatonin, leading to poor sleep quality, body fatigue, and a predictable decline in sexual desire.
Sleep plays a crucial role in sex hormones. Studies indicate that just one week of sleeping less than 5 hours per night can reduce testosterone levels in men by 10-15%. For women, sleep deprivation also disrupts hormones, causing fatigue and decreased sexual interest. When both partners are exhausted from staying up late with their phones, their intimate life gradually falls to a low priority.
Beyond physiological effects, ignoring one's partner to focus on a phone – a phenomenon known as "phubbing" – also causes emotional harm, leading to a decline in intimate desire over time. "Desire doesn't spontaneously switch on like a light; it's nurtured through communication, sharing, and small touches throughout the day", the doctor explained.
Phones also impact the brain's reward system via dopamine, a neurotransmitter that creates feelings of pleasure. Notifications, short videos, and 'likes' provide rapid, continuous stimulation, making the brain less sensitive to slower, natural stimuli like conversation or cuddling. When emotional energy is consumed by screens, feelings of closeness with one's partner also diminish.
For the patient mentioned, the doctor recommended that the couple establish a "device-free time" of at least 60 minutes before bed, completely turn off screens when in bed, and spend time talking and having intimate contact instead of each using a phone. After about 6 weeks of adjusting their habits, the patient reported a significant improvement: easier and longer-lasting erections, and a gradual return of emotional connection with his wife.
"This demonstrates that simply by changing daily habits and prioritizing connection, sexual life can recover without complex medical intervention", the doctor said. He also noted there's no need for an absolute "phone detox", but clear boundaries are essential, especially in the evening. The bedroom should be a space prioritized for rest and marital connection.
Le Phuong
