Answering only in your head, not daring to speak out
"Answering in your head, not in reality" is the tendency to rehearse or simulate responses but not verbalize or act on them. This habit seems harmless, but research suggests that relying too much on internal feedback instead of real-world interaction can be counterproductive. When you only think about the answer, you often overestimate your actual ability to recall or apply it, while the reality is different.
Research by Hattie & Timperley emphasizes that feedback is essential for improving performance. If you don't verbalize, your brain won't build strong connections, while humans learn faster by acting, failing, and adjusting. Internal responses (thinking to yourself) can become a form of mental avoidance.
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Just thinking but not acting reduces human performance. Illustrative photo: Pexels |
Just thinking but not acting reduces human performance. Illustrative photo: Pexels
Canceling plans at the last minute
"I can't make it" may be a simple message, and we've all done it at some point. However, canceling plans at the last minute is actually an annoying behavior because it disrupts other people's schedules and expectations. Psychosocial research by Baumeister & Leary in 2015 indicates that frequent cancellations can decrease trustworthiness, making others feel rejected or unimportant.
Sometimes, people cancel late not because they want to annoy or disrupt, but because of last-minute changes in mood or energy. Committing to plans can create pressure or social anxiety, leading some to withdraw, but communicating this early will minimize the risk of misunderstanding. Canceling plans also breaks your commitment, making it harder to pursue future goals. This damages your habits and discipline.
Writing down to-do lists and then ignoring them
Creating a detailed to-do list provides a sense of control and organization, making one feel productive. However, completing tasks actually requires effort, discipline, and sustained motivation. This is what most people lack. Therefore, the mentality of "writing it down and then ignoring it" is just a way to appease one's own conscience.
Overreacting to typos
Overreacting to typos when reading work documents or emails is a common experience for many because everyone wants to appear professional and meticulous. In reality, overthinking and stressing over a minor typo is unnecessary. Anyone can make typos, and it's an extremely common human behavior. Overreacting can create barriers in relationships, creativity, learning ability, and even your own productivity.
Research by Flett & Hewitt (2002) found that maladaptive perfectionism leads to fear of making mistakes, self-criticism, and emotional distress. As a result, you can spend too much time correcting minor errors while ignoring more important content or ideas. Excessive focus on accuracy kills motivation and originality. The research team of Boland & Queen (2016) also found that those who react negatively to grammatical errors tend to score lower on agreeableness and tolerance.
Thuy Linh (TimesofIndia)
