A study published in 2024 by the US National Library of Medicine indicates that regrets often arise from comparing reality with what "should have been". If unresolved, these thoughts can create pressure on mental and physical health.
Australian nurse Bronnie Ware's book, "The 5 Biggest Regrets of the Dying", became a global phenomenon after documenting patients' confessions. Building on this, modern psychologists have conducted expanded surveys, identifying 6 areas people regret most.
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Living according to others' expectations
In many families, obedience is considered the measure of a good child. The fear of disappointing parents leads many to suppress personal desires.
Renowned US psychotherapist Joan E. Childs believes that losing one's authentic self to adapt to others' expectations is a common mistake. According to the expert, reaching the end of life without knowing "who you truly are" is a major regret.
Not enjoying experiences at the right time
Many experiences are time-sensitive; for example, travel is often most feasible when young, before family responsibilities arise. If postponed to prioritize career or financial savings, individuals may regret it as opportunities to fulfill these plans diminish over time.
Losing identity due to ambition
Sacrificing for work is often seen as a measure of success in modern society. However, excessive trade-offs cause many to forget their personal values.
According to Heidi Godman, executive director of Harvard Health Publishing (US), abandoning all hobbies like writing or playing music to focus on work is a mistake many make. The expert advises maintaining passions as a way to protect one's unique values while pursuing a career.
Suppressing emotions
Many choose to hide their true selves for a sense of security. US psychotherapist Chelli Pumphrey notes that if emotions are not expressed, people struggle to find genuine connections. Regret over missed opportunities often brings a lasting psychological burden greater than direct rejection.
Hesitating to take risks
Societal pressure often steers individuals toward stability. Youth is the period with the most time and energy. Stepping out of one's comfort zone provides invaluable lessons that stability cannot offer. Even if they fail, young people still have the ability to start anew.
Not reconciling with loved ones in time
Indian medical doctor Akshad Singi cites an example: his father and uncle had cut off contact for many years. They only reunited when his uncle was in a deep coma. A bedside apology at that point held no meaning, leaving his father with lingering remorse.
US psychotherapist Melissa Fritchle believes that most relationships can be mended if each person focuses on core values. Proactive reconciliation helps resolve past issues. Completely severing a relationship, especially with a loved one, should only be a last resort.
Nhat Minh (According to Yourtango)
