Marie represents the "low contact" trend, which is gaining popularity among young people in early 2026. This approach involves adult children establishing boundaries with parents, often in response to difficult family dynamics. For Marie, this reaction developed after years of rejection, hurt, and being consistently labeled the "black sheep"—the one who was different and often criticized in her family.
Marie's mother consistently steered conversations to herself, making Marie hesitant to express emotions. "Every time I mentioned feeling tired, my mother recounted her illnesses or hardships", she stated. This peaked when Marie announced her autism diagnosis; her mother responded with indifference.
Following her therapist's advice, Marie understood she could not control others' behavior but could manage her own reception. She decided to adopt a "low contact" approach with her mother.
Marie stopped answering calls immediately. She, her husband, and their children also limited visits to her mother, the children's grandmother, despite living only a few hours' drive away. Marie only initiated calls for clear purposes, such as: inquiring about health or conveying essential information. During calls, she avoided sharing personal matters to prevent her mother from discussing them. When her mother began complaining, Marie used a pre-planned script: claiming to be busy, asking a superficial question, then ending the call.
"I still love my mother and do not want to cut ties completely", Marie stated. She wanted her children to still have their grandmother and for herself to avoid the heavy guilt associated with completely "disowning" her family.
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Illustration: Guardian.
As more families experience toxic dynamics, many are choosing to maintain relationships at a minimal level, carefully controlling the frequency and content of their interactions, rather than opting for "no contact".
Georgina, 30, also chose this path after growing up in a family where everyone had to gauge her mother's mood. Following a major argument, she reduced contact with her parents and siblings. Her mother still sees her grandchildren once a week, but Georgina keeps conversations brief. She did not make an outright declaration, instead quietly withdrawing. Although her mother initially reacted strongly, she eventually accepted this new level of connection to see her grandchildren.
A YouGov survey indicates that 38% of adults in the US are experiencing estrangement from at least one family member. This trend reflects increasing awareness of mental health and unhealthy relationships. Young people today feel less bound by a "duty to endure" compared to previous generations, instead prioritizing their individual emotions.
Katherine Cavallo, a family therapist with 25 years of experience, states that "no contact" should only be a last resort in cases of severe violence or abuse.
"In other situations, low contact is a reasonable compromise. It helps reduce pressure without closing the door to future reconciliation", Cavallo said.
However, the expert warns that reducing contact does not make conflicts disappear. It requires skill to avoid becoming a form of evasion. Boundaries extend beyond simply reducing call numbers. Some individuals choose to meet in neutral spaces, such as: cafes or parks, instead of at home, or participate in shared activities like grocery shopping or watching movies, to limit direct conversation time that can easily lead to conflict.
Ngoc Ngan (According to Guardian)
