He always woke up at 4 a.m. to make her coffee, writing daily love letters filled with praise. When she felt stressed, he secretly booked tickets for a wedding in Hawaii. Keely’s videos initiated the "high-effort boyfriend" trend, which spread rapidly late last year.
Thousands of women began sharing similar stories. A woman named Alessia proudly boasted she had not visited a gas station all year because her boyfriend always filled her tank. Another woman, Kylie, declared she "never touched a doorknob" as her partner forbade her from such trivial tasks. Emily even admitted she did not know how to pay utility bills and always used her boyfriend’s credit card for shopping.
This trend celebrates men who handle everything from finances to the smallest tasks, literally transforming their partners into "princesses".
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U.S. social media was abuzz with the 'high-effort boyfriend' trend late last year. *Illustration: Independent* |
However, behind the glamour, experts warn this trend is a psychological trap. The instability became evident in Keely’s own video: when she attempted to pay for clothes herself, her fiance reacted sharply, asserting his dominance by taking over the payment.
Kate Mansfield, a relationship expert, states that complete financial dependence erodes women’s autonomy. "When one person controls all finances, it becomes very difficult for the other to leave if the relationship turns toxic," she said.
Many videos also show men dictating women’s appearance, from booking nail appointments to demanding makeup adjustments. Therapist Matt Davies suggests these actions subtly turn women into "display objects" to satisfy male ego, rather than stemming from genuine care.
More dangerously, this trend promotes "infantilization". Adult women gradually lose basic life skills like fueling their cars or paying bills. "The 'knight in shining armor' motif may seem romantic initially, but in the long run, it strips women of agency over their lives," Davies explained.
Bao Nhien (According to Independent)
