In 2021, Charlotte and her husband, Raffi Grinberg, realized that if they continued their current lifestyle, the time they would spend with friends from age 30 onward would be less than the period from 13 to 30.

At the time, they lived in Boston while their close friends were in Washington D.C. The geographical distance meant that every visit incurred travel costs and required hiring a babysitter. On one occasion, the group spent months arranging a movie outing, only to leave midway to relieve their childcare provider.

In 2023, Charlotte and her husband decided to move to Washington D.C., purchasing a townhouse right next to their best friends' home. Another couple from their group also relocated to the same neighborhood, creating three adjacent households.

The boundaries between the three homes became fluid. Children moved freely between houses, adults helped with childcare, shared belongings, and offered support during unexpected events. "In the past six months, we've interacted more than in the previous six years combined", Charlotte stated.

Illustration: Pexels

The Charlotte family's story reflects a growing "living near friends" trend in the US. A Pew Research Center survey revealed that over half of parents lack sufficient time for friends, despite the early childhood years being when they need support most.

Another survey by real estate platform Zillow reported that 14% of homebuyers have either pursued or considered living near friends. Phil Levin, founder of the Live Near Friends platform, noted that nearly half of his 2,000 users sought to live near friends for co-parenting.

According to Professor Kristen Ghodsee of the University of Pennsylvania, the modern nuclear family model often leaves many parents feeling isolated and struggling independently. When geographical distance or complex family relations are factors, friends emerge as a viable alternative.

However, living near close friends means accepting differences in parenting styles.

Kim Seashore and her husband, Jeff Hobson, who reside in a co-housing community in Berkeley, California, shared that having many adults around alleviates pressure. However, this close-knit environment also creates unexpected situations. On one occasion, their son misbehaved but instead of staying with his mother, he ran to a neighbor's house for comfort.

Additionally, differing household rules can be a hurdle. Kristin, a parent who once lived in the same neighborhood as close friends, recounted frequent disagreements with her friend regarding children's consumption of processed foods and screen time. "If we lived separately, we would decide how to balance our children's needs. When living together, that flexibility decreases", she explained.

Despite these inconveniences, many families still choose this model. By the end of the year, three mothers in Charlotte's neighborhood gave birth. When Charlotte was hospitalized, her close friend stepped in to care for her newborn. A few months later, Charlotte was also at the hospital to support her friend.

Exchanging milk cartons, pain relievers, or watching children on weekends gradually established a new way of life for these families. "I used to think living next to friends was about having more companions in raising children", Charlotte said. "But they are not just friends; they are my family".

Nhat Minh (According to Atlantic)